Fred Thompson, that sad hound dog look alike, has announced that he will announce, next week. This is a man who has been running as a presidential candidate almost since the beginning of the year without declaring his candidacy, has finally decided to announce that he is now a candidate, get that? This is the man Chris Mathews, also known as Tweety, slobbered over as a big daddy type candidate of old, because Chris is in need of a daddy figure. Don't ask me, I don't know why that man says those things! Now, can you imagine Hound Dog Fred in the house with his wife Jeri "Boobalicious Babe Thompson, and the little pound puppies in the White House? You've got a better imagination than I have, let me tell you.
Well, I'm going to be friend to the Mrs. Right here, and right now, I am going to tell Boobalicious something, and I have every right to, because you see, I too, am a boobalicious babe. Unfortunately, I don't look anything like Jeri, but I do have the puppies, and mine are au natural. I come by mine through mother nature, and not through doctor suture. Don't get me wrong, for all I know, hers might be natural too, but really, come on, we all know white girls ain't got it like that. Boobalicious, you need to cover those bad boys up girl. Peeps will not have you running around da House all exposed like that, girlfriend. Oh, and do wear a bra honey, they do have them in our size. And that mumu thing you wear? Please, ditch that rag girl, don't you have any Anne Klein Donna Karan, or any of the designers in your closet? No, no, not Fredrick's of Hollywood, dear, you must only wear that on the night you give Fred some, wink, wink. Yes, I know you've got two puppies in the kennel, but really, you must still do your wifely duties, and while I know it's an onerous task, you really must remember your republican duties as a wife and act accordingly. A trip to New York and the houses of fashion there is in order, and please, no side trips to Kmart, and definitely no blue light specials. And dayum, girlfriend, please burn that dress if you already haven't. Does she look like the fish wife or what?
Well, I'm going to be friend to the Mrs. Right here, and right now, I am going to tell Boobalicious something, and I have every right to, because you see, I too, am a boobalicious babe. Unfortunately, I don't look anything like Jeri, but I do have the puppies, and mine are au natural. I come by mine through mother nature, and not through doctor suture. Don't get me wrong, for all I know, hers might be natural too, but really, come on, we all know white girls ain't got it like that. Boobalicious, you need to cover those bad boys up girl. Peeps will not have you running around da House all exposed like that, girlfriend. Oh, and do wear a bra honey, they do have them in our size. And that mumu thing you wear? Please, ditch that rag girl, don't you have any Anne Klein Donna Karan, or any of the designers in your closet? No, no, not Fredrick's of Hollywood, dear, you must only wear that on the night you give Fred some, wink, wink. Yes, I know you've got two puppies in the kennel, but really, you must still do your wifely duties, and while I know it's an onerous task, you really must remember your republican duties as a wife and act accordingly. A trip to New York and the houses of fashion there is in order, and please, no side trips to Kmart, and definitely no blue light specials. And dayum, girlfriend, please burn that dress if you already haven't. Does she look like the fish wife or what?
